


would have loved her

by parkrstark



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Dialogue Heavy, F/M, Gen, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Good Dad, Peter misses Tony, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), We miss tony, everyone misses tony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:08:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24785152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parkrstark/pseuds/parkrstark
Summary: Peter doesn't feel Tony at lakehouse. He feels him when he sits on their couch in the lab. Whenever he can, he visits again and talks to him like he never left. Sometimes, Peter's left wishing he could have met her. The feeling isn't new, but it hurts just as much as it always has.
Relationships: Ben Parker & Peter Parker, Michelle Jones/Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 17
Kudos: 149
Collections: Peter Parker is a Good Dad





	would have loved her

**Author's Note:**

> just a quick thing that came to mind when I found the song Would Have Loved Her by Chris Brandi. I swear I have a happy dad!peter fic planned for Father's day. (If that ever gets done, let's be real).

Pepper likes to sit on the dock at the cabin with Morgan. She invites Peter to join them sometimes, and Peter can’t really say no. So he sits with them as they talk to Tony. 

Peter never says a word when he's there. He doesn't feel Tony there. That dock just reminds him of a stiff black suit, and a flower wreath floating in the water, and crying. 

Pepper and Morgan might have good memories of Tony being here, but Peter doesn't. Days after being brought back and fighting against Thanos, he was at Tony's funeral. That's the only memory he has of that place. 

But where he feels him, he knows they wouldn't. The tower wasn't sold and is being used for Stark Industries still. After Peter and May came back from in the Blip, they lived here for a bit until they could find a new apartment. 

The lab though was still where it always was. No one touched it since Tony was here. Peter likes to keep it that way. No one went in there besides for him and Tony anyway. His death doesn't change that. 

The first time he goes into the lab, he cries. 

The next time, he runs right back out and has a panic attack in the elevator and stays there until Happy finds him. 

The third time is when he finally speaks. His conversation with Tony is short and hesitant. He almost feels self-conscious for talking to  _ nothing.  _ (He mentions this to May one night and she gives him an odd look. "Nothing? Don't you feel him there with you? That's not nothing.") 

The fourth time, he just sits on the couch and  _ feels.  _ He remembers what it's like to be with Tony. 

Then it starts to get easier to talk to him. It starts as small talk and then it slowly becomes him laying on the couch talking to Tony for hours. 

By now, he's lost track of how many visits he's given to Tony. 

He walks into the lab and immediately heads for the couch. He remembers the countless times he fell asleep on these cushions, waiting for Tony to finish one of his projects. But there's no hand in his hair, messing with his curls. There hasn't been in months-- well, years. 

"Hey, Mr. Stark," he says to the empty room. "I know it's been over a week since the last time I've come to see you. I've been a little busy…" 

If Tony is really up there, looking down at him, he'd already know. But he wants to  _ tell him.  _ He wants to see the look on his face, hear his teasing words, but he knows he won't get that. He can have this though. 

"I met this girl...well, I met her before all of this but...she was just another girl. And now, now she's  _ my  _ girl." He feels his cheeks blush and can just imagine Tony giving him a hard time about having a crush. 

"We've only been on a few dates. After our science trip, we kinda made it official. And I don't want to rush anything, but it feels like she could be the one." 

Peter smiles at the ceiling, relaxing on the couch. "She's amazing. Beautiful and so smart. She reminds me a lot of you. Sarcastic and bright and strong minded." 

He closes his eyes and sees her. His smile deepens. He sees her dark curls, her chocolate skin that tastes just as sweet when he kisses her, her warm brown eyes. 

"I know it's only been a few weeks, but I feel like I've known her for forever. She makes me a better man, just like did. I wish you could just meet each other." He swallows the lump in his throat. "Because I know you would have loved her." 

  
  


Three years later and he's still visiting Tony in the lab. It's harder now because he spends most of his days at MIT and even when he goes to his classes in a building named after his late mentor, he doesn't feel him there. 

He feels him here as he lays on the lumpy couch. (The same couch that Rhodey had gotten rid of last year and replaced it with a new one. He was trying to help Peter since he knew how often he used that thing. He didn't realize his mistake until Peter walked into the lab one day and cried. He got it back within the next hour.)

"Hey, Mr. Stark. Guess what?" He lifts his hand up, the gold band on his finger shining in even the dim lighting. "I married her last month. It was small. Immediate family only." 

It's funny that all of Peter's immediate family at the wedding aren't really his immediate family. At least, not by blood. 

"We saved a few empty seats up front. My parents, Uncle Ben, and you." He stares at the band on his finger. "You would have liked how simple it was I think. You would have loved the band. Probably would have been on that dance floor all night, might have even stolen my beautiful bride for a dance or two." 

He pulls out his phone and starts swiping through the photos from that night, as if Tony can see them with him. 

"Happy and Rhodey were up there a lot. I bet you would have laughed." Then he thinks about the speeches they gave that Tony should have. "I bet you would have cried too." 

Tony wasn't there to see him kiss his bride and say his vows. He wasn't there to see her in her dress. He wasn't there to even meet her. 

"I bet if you saw her that day...the way she smiled at me the entire night. You'd understand why I'm so wrapped around her finger. She's my everything. She laughs at my lame jokes, we dance as I sing to her in our tiny shoebox apartment, she makes me smile…" 

He ends the conversation the same way he always does when he talks about MJ, "I wish you could have met her. I know you would have loved her." 

  
  


Two years after that, Peter's crying before he even walks into the room. 

"Hey, Mr. Stark." He pauses, unsure of how to start this. It's been a few weeks since she was born and of course, Tony knows about her. If he's looking down, she does. 

But this is their first official introduction. 

He turns down to look at the sleeping baby in his arms. She's got her mother's eyes, her mother's smile, her mother's skin...Peter wants her to be just like her mother. Her father is broken pieces glued together. Her mother is so much more. 

"This is your grandbaby," Peter says. He watches her eyes shift underneath her closed lids and he hopes her dreams are happy. "Toni Parker-Jones." 

She lets out a little whine, still asleep, at her name. 

"It's not short for anything. Michelle and I didn't like Antonia or Antoinette. Didn't feel right." He shrugs his shoulders. "But Toni fits her. She never sleeps and her only hobby in life is to drive me crazy. Toni like Tony, huh?" 

He brushes a thumb on her cheek, wishing she could always stay in his arms this tiny, this safe. 

"I remember I used to wish you could meet my Uncle Ben. I don't remember if I ever told you...but I'd imagine you two being friends. I would have given anything for you to meet him…" Peter feels the first tear roll down his cheek. "And now, my wish came true." 

As if Toni senses her father's distress, she blinks her eyes open and lets out a long whine. Then her brown eyes find Peter and she reaches a tiny little fist for him. 

"I hope you both can see her from up there. I hope you can see every second of her life. I wish you could have been here beside me watching her grow up." 

Peter's voice is thick with tears when he continues, "I wish you could have seen  _ me  _ grow up." 

He's speaking to the both of them now. He hoped they're both listening, side by side. 

"I bet you would have been there waiting in the hospital to meet her. I bet you have spoiled her silly." 

He lifts her to his lips and kisses her forehead. 

"I see you in her every day...I wish you could have met her."

Toni lets out a loud coo, happy to have her father's attention. Peter stares into her big brown eyes and sees Ben. He sees Tony. 

"I know you would have loved her." 


End file.
